Commitment issues dating relationship
Commitment-phobes tend to have a lot of short-term relationships and are serial daters. The challenge with posing this kind of question is you may get an extremely vague response or they might skillfully change the subject.” Since a commitment-phobe is perfectly happy keeping the relationship at the honeymoon stage for as long as possible, YOU need to establish your own timeline in which you’re willing to wait around or notice the relationship progress, says Ray.So, you should definitely ask what their relationship goals are, and also be clear what your goals are, suggests professional matchmaker and dating coach Carmelia Ray, who also stars on Myx TV’s Mom vs. “Notice if your relationship actually feels like a commitment versus a part-time thing.A relationship is a two-way street and if all the effort is one-sided, it’s clearly time to move on or reassess unless you’re OK with the constant disappointments.” If you truly love them and want to stay with them, you honestly do have to wait, says millennial dating expert and host of the We Met At Acme podcast, Lindsey Metselaar.“Lead by example and show them how rewarding it is to commit to people and to things.
Metselaar says sometimes, you have to let them bring it up naturally because they’re the one with the phobia. “If you’re frustrated and really need to have that conversation, then tell them to come back to you when they’re ready to discuss it.” Signs that your partner may never commit can present themselves in the beginning of relationship and often we like to think that we can change them. And if you do convince them to commit, there are no guarantees the relationship will even be a healthy one.
In other words, it shows that even though they’re committed to you, they won’t feel suffocated.
Commitment may be considered a relationship skill because the abilities necessary to make and keep commitments must be learned, practiced, and refined just like those for effective couple communication (see Wiley 2007 in this issue) or any other relationship skill.
Underlying their fear of commitment is the FEAR of getting hurt.
“A great way to deal with someone who may have been burned in the past or hasn’t had much of an example of a healthy relationship is to work on deeper and more open communication.